small stone #16

Fresh wet snow, wash me clean. So raw inside it hurts to think. Buddha Maitreya chant soothing balm. The intimacy of the rawness takes me back to the beginningness of my choices to be in this body. I take note of the sweetness and gentleness of this image over five decades old. We were leaning into one another.

small stone #15

3am clockwork; inner heat, outer cool.
slide left leg out from under the covers to balance out the temperatures.
a many layered 30 seconds; inner combustion, thin layer of sweat, cool relief of open air, back to sleep.
the trick is not too get too excited so I can easily fall back to sleep.

small stone #14

walking Lucy,
cool cheeks,
clearing the senses and moving the body.

small stone #13

holding #8 steel blue knitting needles, 40 garter stitches, nothing fancy. I'm making a scarf, I'm always making a scarf and it doesn't seem to really matter that I don't have a finished product. That's not why I knit. Right now, it's mostly about bringing my mind into the present moment, staying aware of my breath...breathing in bring right needle under loop on left needle, loop yarn around, over, feel the drag of the wool yarn across my index finger, pull the needle through and voila! another stitch is born...breathing out start again. Keep the yarn just so...not too taught, not too loose...the middle way...keeping the hands busy, the mind occupied, the shoulders down and relaxed, the head tipped slightly down but not strained. I think I love to knit.

Small stone #12

Mental holiday; smiling large
with gratitude and not acting
In haste. Appreciative for
alone time.

small stone #11

alright...earlier today..."noticing properly"...but unable to write about it for hours...one more "don't you remember in our training Mary, these are the things you need to remember Mary, are you still working on that?"...it took every fiber of my being from just packing up my things and leaving. I've spent 8 months with this person and every single button/issue that can be pushed is being pushed. It was interesting to watch myself and feel the intensity of wanting to leave...change...run...quit...there are times when I am willing to recognize the lessons staring me flat in my face and there are the times when I want to say, alright, I believe enough is enough and dear universe, may I please learn these lessons somewhere else, with someone else or better yet, may I simply be done with this lesson now? Thank you kind universe in advance for hearing my request!

Small stone #10

An interior moment with you, mom.
Not always the easiest relationship
And it feels like I can love you
Even more, now, fuller, unconditionally
Now that you dance in the ethers
With Dad.